


The Fear of Loving You

by VoidsEmbrace



Series: Lup Will Get What She Wants [1]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Canon Trans Character, Coming Out, F/M, Fluff, Gender Dysphoria, Groping, Kissing, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Oral Sex, coming out as trans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-21
Updated: 2018-07-22
Packaged: 2019-06-14 02:04:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15378336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VoidsEmbrace/pseuds/VoidsEmbrace
Summary: Lup and Barry are officially a couple now; but there’s one thing Lup has been putting off telling her boyfriend, and she’s afraid of how he’ll react when she finally gets the courage to tell him.Or;In which Lup can no longer live “stealth” with how close her relationship with Barry has gotten lately, and her struggles of coming out to the love of her goddamn life.*Warning: Contains gender dysphoria themes, the stress of coming out as trans, etc. If you are sensitive to that content, please think twice about reading this fic and put your own safety first.





	1. The Stolen Moment

**Author's Note:**

> (This is my first real attempt at writing a fic revolving around a trans woman and her struggles. While I’m not a trans woman, I am a trans guy so I have an understanding of gender dysphoria from a different perspective. In this fic, Lup has already socially transitioned and has been going through the process of medically/magically transitioning and has pretty much everything figured out aside from recreating accurate AFAB genitals through transmutation magic that will last for long amounts of time, if not permanently. For now, she uses illusion magic to alleviate dysphoria downstairs. As I said, I am not a trans woman, but am open to suggestions and corrections from trans women/transfeminine people who think I can do better! Hopefully I do Lup justice, enjoy!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Looking back, this performance is where that love that Barry and Lup cultivated quietly and cautiously over the last half century truly bloomed. There was romance in every measure, and longing in every note. And after the performance, they- they take each other’s hands high in the air, and they swoop down for this over-the-top bow, just laughing at- at the drama of it all. And the audience cheers. And Barry and Lup laugh, and they don’t let each other’s hands go. And then they stop laughing, and they don’t let each other’s hands go. And they keep not letting go. And Lup says, ‘Barry, do you wanna go talk somewhere for a while?’ And Barry says, ‘Yeah.’” -Griffin McElroy, The Adventure Zone Episode 64.

Lup and Barry collapsed in their conservatory room, laughing breathlessly and still hand-in-hand. They hadn’t stayed to find out if their song was accepted. Performing it together in front of their audience was much more important. It was a statement. It was _their_ statement.

Barry was no expert at hiding his feelings, especially when it came to love. Surely the crew had caught on to his feelings for Lup, as much as they both tried to keep it a secret. After all, there was much more they had to worry about besides romance.

And Lup… Lup was an open book when it came to Taako. It hurt to try and hide this from him, but she couldn’t have him worrying about her heart when they were constantly being hunted by The Hunger.  
  
But now they didn’t have to hide anymore. They were closer and closer to defeating The Hunger, Barry and Lup both knew it. They both felt the end of their journey was drawing near, and soon everything would be back to normal. This loop had been the perfect time to come out and compose a music piece held together by the bonds of their cautiously harbored love.

And yet, this wouldn’t be the first or last time Lup came out. Lup had told herself over and over that today was the day she would finally tell Barold. She’s come out to people before. She’s been transitioning for years now.

But every time she’s gotten the opportunity to tell Barry, she would seize up and lose all courage. This wasn’t like her, Lup wasn’t shy like this. Lup didn’t get anxious easily. Still, she would find herself avoiding having this conversation with Barry. Was that unfair of her to not tell Barry? Taako always told her she never owed it to anyone to disclose her trans status, but she really fucking loved Barry Bluejeans. She loved his stupid nerdy grin and his ridiculous love for blue jeans, she loved the way he would try to push up his glasses even if he’d forgotten to put them on after a long night of lab work. She loved how his gruff voice didn’t match his soft demeanor, the way it pitched just a bit deeper when he flirted with her.

This was it, she told herself. She was finally going to do this, no backing out now.

“Lup, that was amazing…!” Barry panted, wiping the sweat from his brow and grinning at her in that goofy way he did when he was infatuated with her.

Lup couldn’t help but smile back. Barry’s smile was contagious. “ _We_ were amazing, Barold.”

“Of course! Of course.” He gazed at her, heart swelling. “Lup, I… I know we’re really close to beating this thing. And I know we’ve been keeping our feelings on the down-low…” He took a moment to catch his breath and collect his thoughts. “I really… I really like you Lup.”  
  
“I know you do, you big nerd.” Lup said in a teasing tone, though there was never any malice behind her insults towards Barry. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about that…” She swallowed. This was it.

But before she could say anything, Barry was overwhelmed with emotion. “Lup, I can’t hide my feelings any longer.” He clasped his hands around hers. “Lup, I like you a lot. More than a lab partner, more than a crewmember. Hell, I think I might love you more than anything in all the dimensions we’ve traveled through.”  
  
This caught Lup off guard. “Barry, I…” She stopped, shaking her head and smiling, never finishing her statement. “You love me more than the blue jeans dimension?”

“More than the blue jeans dimension, yeah.” He chuckled softly in disbelief. “Lup, I know we were trying to hold this off until we got out of this mess… But I don’t think I can anymore. This whole cycle, working together, I just don’t think I can go back to the way it was without being distracted from my work.” He drew circles on her knuckles with his thumbs. “I understand if you don’t want to get into a relationship with the hell we’ve all been through, but I at least need to tell you how I feel.”

Lup met his gaze. She could see the sadness, the hurt, the love, the want. She felt it too. Lup wanted nothing more than to wake up and find that all this was an illusion cast on them, to be able to laugh with Barry about it, to be able to hug him without fearing it may be the last hug she gets for the rest of a cycle. “It’s okay, Barry.”

“Lup, will you be mine?” He said after a long moment of silence.

Lup hesitated, but not for the reasons Barry thought she did. She _really_ should tell him. “I would love that. I love that idea.”

 _Lup! You need to tell him._ She thought to herself. But Barry was already crying tears of joy and hugging her, so she didn’t want to spoil the moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! This first chapter was just a short one for setting up the plot, the next chapter is longer!


	2. The Stolen Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry and Lup do some smooching. Taako gives some brotherly advice.

It had been a while since Barry and Lup had time to themselves. But when they did, they were constantly sneaking off or hiding away in their room. At first, it was only to get some privacy and snuggle up—to comfort each other, be with each other. Occasionally, Barry would pepper Lup’s cheeks in innocent kisses. This night was no different. After the crew of the Starblaster had dinner, Barry and Lup had quickly excused themselves to their quarters, which they now shared. As soon as the door was closed, Barry was smooching on Lup.

As cautious as Lup was being with Barry until she could come out, she couldn’t help but enjoy the attention he gave her. “Easy, Bear. Can’t a girl settle down before you start the smooch fest?”

They both laughed softly. “Sorry Lu, I couldn’t help myself. You did really well on dinner tonight.” Barry smiled sheepishly, and gave her some space so they could both change out of their uniforms. Once they were in their pajamas, they settled in Barry’s bed. Barry was slightly disappointed that Lup didn’t want to share a bed when they slept just yet, but he respected her decision. At least they still got to cuddle.

Lup slid close to Barry and wrapped herself in his warm embrace. “Now we can start the smooch fest.” She smiled, placing a single kiss to his cheek.

“You don’t have to tell me twice.” Barry said between soft kisses. He showered her in smooches all across her cheeks, one for each freckle Lup had. Needless to say, she had a lot. After a few moments of silence between them, Barry spoke up “Hey Lup?”

“Yeah babe?”

“I know you wanted to take things slow, but… Do you think I could at least give you a real kiss?”

Lup propped herself up on her elbow. “This whole time you’ve been giving me fake kisses? I’m appalled!”

Barry opened his mouth to rephrase, but Lup placed a finger to his lips before he could say anything.

“Barold Bluejeans. If you wanna kiss me, be my guest. But it had better be the best damn kiss you’ve ever given. I want you to smooch my brains out.” Her tone was light and teasing, but it still made Barry mutter nervously about how that was a lot of pressure to put on a guy. “Barry, I’m joking. Just kiss me, you fool.”

“I… Yeah. Okay! But, please keep your brains in. Er, brain.” He smiled and shook his head, brushing Lup’s hair out of her face before leaning in to kiss her full on the lips.

 _Oh. Oh no, there go my brains._ Lup thought. Barry’s lips were so much softer against her own, he moisturized without a doubt. There was also a hint of something, slightly minty, that just tasted like _Barry_.

They both broke the kiss at the same time, feeling awestruck. Hues of red filled the gaps between Lup’s freckles, and Barry was blushing as well.

“Sorry Barold,” Lup finally spoke up. “My brains are gone. Poof. You smooched them right out alright.”

Barry couldn’t hold back his snort. “Yeah, uh. Yeah. Mine too.”

Lup knew she was getting herself into trouble. She was falling for Barry before, but now she was headed on a one-way train straight to Barry Town, population: her. She had to tell him, she needed to know if he would still love her on her worst days, but she didn’t have it in her to bring it up. Not yet.

 

* * *

 

 

They were working in the lab one particularly stressful cycle. They had pinpointed the Light, they just needed to figure out how to get it safely. Magnus offered to sacrifice himself, but Barry was determined to find another way. They were all hurting from the sacrifices they’d already made. Barry sat with his head in his hands, frustrated.

“Babe, it’s late… let’s call it a night.” Lup said softly, rubbing his shoulders. “I know you’re worried about Magnus, but he’s a big boy. If he rushes in, that’s his decision. I don’t like it any more than you do, but there’s not much we can do to stop him. He’ll come back…”

“I know. I know… I just. Magnus always does this. I feel like it’s my job to do better. No one should have to sacrifice themselves if we don’t need to. I’ve been exhausted, I haven’t been doing my best to find safer ways of extracting the Light.” He sighed. He did sound exhausted. Lup hugged him from behind.

“If you’re so exhausted, why don’t you sleep, you big nerd?” She said. “C’mon Bear. It’s time for you to go to bed.” Lup wouldn’t take no for an answer, and started tugging on his arm until he looked up at her with tired eyes.

Barry silently got up and let Lup lead him to their quarters. After getting ready for bed and changing into pajamas, Lup sat on the edge of his bed and stroked his hair until sleep finally took him.

Once Barry was asleep, Lup slipped away to see her brother. “Taako?” She knocked quietly before he let her in his quarters. “Can we talk?”

“Of course we can, Lulu. What’s up? You got boy troubles? Am I gonna have to magic missile Barold?”

“No, it’s… the usual.” She sighed, losing her cool façade. “I still haven’t been able to come out to him. I know it’s dumb, I’m not like this, but Taako… I really love him. I don’t want to mess this up.”

“Hm, sounds like boy troubles to me.” Taako hummed. “Sit down, let me brush your hair, sis. You tell me what’s stopping you.”

Lup sat cross-legged on Taako’s bed and he sat behind her, brushing out her long hair. “Oh Taako, I don’t even know. Any other person and I’d be done with it by now, I’d kick them to the curb if they didn’t accept me, but Barry is different. I love him so much, like—Taako, he is the  _one_. What if he gets mad?" She threw her hands up in the air. "What if I’m stuck with him ignoring me until we get out of these loops? What if we never get out of it? What if this is some sort of punishment—” She started to tear up.

“Lup," Taako interrupted. "Darling, listen to me. I’ve kinda been there, done that with being gay. The whole self-destructive thinking that being gay or trans or what have you is something that needs punishing. Don’t let it get in your head that you're just waiting for some punishment just for being your best self.” He continued to gently brush knots out of his sister’s hair. “For sure it was hard for me, I can’t even imagine how much harder it is for you. But no matter what happens, you can’t let it get to you." He set the brush aside. "Your first priority is you. If it's getting to you this much, don’t worry about your nerd. Worry about the next step to being comfortable with yourself. You dig it?”

“Yeah… I can dig it.” She said, wiping her eyes. “I just hate feeling this way… We’re fucking wizards and we can’t even fix me.”

Taako crawled to sit by her side. “Lulu, look at me. There’s nothing to fix. The problem is not with you. You,” He squeezed her arm comfortingly. “Are a fucking badass. And—don’t tell anyone I said this—but you’re clearly the superior twin.” This made Lup snort. “Lulu, you probably feel broken as hell. But I promise you, you’re not. You have a journey to take to reach your final form. To be frank with you, I don’t care if it takes 100 years or 300 years, I’ll be right with you every step of the way.” He hugged her and smiled.

Lup smiled and wiped away more tears before returning the hug. “Thanks, Taako.”

“Now, about coming out to Barry. If you want, I’ll help you.”

“I think I need to do this myself…” Lup sighed.

“That’s all fine and dandy, but you know, I can just magic myself to look like your nerd and you can show me how you’d go about saying it.” He offered.

Lup thought for a moment. “…Okay, yeah.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick note here; I wrote this without taking much consideration into how many cycles this is taking place over. It's somewhat open to interpretation, but I feel like it's a real slow-burner with how busy the Starblaster crew is with finding the Light. So if you're wondering why Barry and Lup haven't had a "real" kiss yet, it's because of how busy I imagine everyone is, and how Lup is uncharacteristically taking things slow because she's procrastinating her coming out and doesn't want to rush in too far without telling Barry.
> 
> Thanks for reading! Next chapter may take a bit longer to put up as it needs a lot of editing, but I'll post it soon!


	3. The Stolen Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The nerds do some more smooching. There's a conveniently placed flashback. Taako turns into Barry.
> 
> And Lup finally comes out, but not in the way she wanted to.

Lup and Barry were tasked with watching the ship while any remaining crewmembers went to retrieve the Light. That being the case, Barry was very eager to show Lup some well-deserved affection. Lup was reading a book on her bed when Barry woke up. She smiled and kissed his cheek when he climbed into bed with her. “’Morning, sleepyhead.”

“G’morning, babe.” He mumbled, placing a sleepy kiss against her lips.

“Did you sleep well?”

“Mm. Yeah, as well as I could.” He sighed playing with Lup’s hair absentmindedly. “I’ll be okay though.”

Lup marked her place in her book and set it aside, allowing room for Barry to snuggle closer.

Barry pressed another kiss to her lips “Smooch fest?”

“Babe, you know I’m always down to clown with a smooch fest.” She cupped his face in her hands and gave him a big ol’ smooch in return. Lup was always bewildered by how soft Barry’s lips were, and how they molded perfectly against hers. Even though he just woke up, Barry rarely tasted like morning breath. He always tasted like something minty, something Barry, something that drove her to constantly want _more_ of him.

Barry must've felt similarly, because soon they were making out without a care in the world. The ship's silence was shattered by their wet kisses and soft gasps for air, followed by more kisses until they felt lightheaded.

Barry pulled back for breath first, reaching to push up the glasses he wasn't wearing. "Wo-wow..." He said as he found his voice.

Lup's only response was a soft sigh. She felt drunk on him, she wanted more. She gazed at Barold with a fiery passion burning in her eyes.

Lup's gaze burned his face red, and he swallowed dryly as she took his hand and placed it on her breast. His eyes darted back and forth between her face and their hands, mouth opening and closing silently.

Lup knew what she wanted, and she wasn't afraid to get it. Except—oh. Oh wait. She definitely was. She snapped back to her senses and quickly let go of Barry's hand. "I—fuck. I got carried away." She started to get up, but Barry grabbed her arm gently.

"Lup, wait. What's wrong?"

 

* * *

 

 

Taako cast disguise self and took on the form of Barry Bluejeans. “Okay, I’m Barry now, so let me set the scene.” He said, his voice still the same. “You and Barold here are doing whatever it is you two do when you’re alone—don’t you dare give me nasty details, I don’t wanna hear it—and you decide it’s time to come out. What do you say?”

Lup sighed. “Taako, I don’t—”

“Sorry, what was that darling? Taako? I’m flattered you think I’m as handsome as that fellow but I’m Barry, my dear.”

Lup rolled her eyes. “Okay, Barry. I need to tell you something.”

“Shoot, I’m all ears.”

“I’m… Okay, Taako, I can’t take this seriously hearing your voice from my boyfriend’s mouth.”

Taako groaned and cleared his throat, taking a moment to concentrate. “Alright, I’ll try Alter Self then.” His form stayed the same, but when he spoke again, he sounded like Barry. “Is this better?”

“Yeah. That’s better.” Lup sighed, then picked up where she left off. “Okay… Barry, I love you, but there’s something about me you don’t know.” She twirled her hair anxiously, trying to find the right words. “I wasn’t born a girl. Well, I was, but my body wasn’t. I’m transgender. I had to… I had to use magic to get this way. I’m still the same person, I’m still a girl, but I still have a small ways to go with my transition before I’m comfortable with my body.”

“Lup, I still love you. And if I don’t for whatever reason, Taako is gonna kick my ass straight to the astral realm. Let’s go make out or whatever!”

Lup shoved him. “Taako! Be serious!”

Taako ended the spell. “I am being serious! That’s how Barold sounds!”

Lup glared at him. “He does not. He’s more classy than that.”

“Okay, you got me. But see? That wasn’t so bad.”

“Yeah, but I knew it was you. Whenever I feel ready to tell him, I get nervous and my heart races and my throat feels so tight I can hardly breathe.” Lup sighed and hugged her knees to her chest.

“Lulu, if you two are really in love, it’ll come to you when you’re ready. You just have to trust yourself. And if I can be real here for a hot second, you’re gonna have to trust Barry too.”

Lup sighed and leaned against her brother. “I know. I’m just so afraid of what might happen if Barry doesn’t trust _me_.”

 

* * *

 

 

"Barry, I can't—I can't keep doing this. I'm sorry."

"Wait, what? Lup, what's wrong? Babe, talk to me." Barry's voice suddenly took on a panicked tone. Ouch. That didn't sound good coming from him.

Lup reluctantly sat down. _Time to stop being afraid_. "Barry.... Love of my life, I haven't been honest with you. And not because I didn't want to. Because I'm so afraid of what you'll think of me....." She couldn't help but tear up.

"Lup? What is it? What's wrong?" Barry reached out to cup her face, but hesitated and instead reached to hold her hand.

"I'm so sorry I never told you earlier." Lup said, her voice turning to a whine as tears flowed down her cheeks.

"Told me what? Baby, it's okay, just breathe..."

"I'm trans, Barry!" She blurted, then covered her mouth as she sobbed.

Barry wrinkled his nose. "You're... Okay, so you're.... Gonna have to be more specific. I'm not sure I follow."

Lup grabbed a pillow and shoved her face in it, shouting. "I was born wrong! I sho-should have been born ri-right but I wasn't! I had to g-gr-grow my own boobs, I had to-o grow out my hair an-and train my voice, and I had to do all this MAGIC and I still don't feel right!"

Barry blinked. "So you're... A trans woman? Is that it? That's what you're upset about?"

Lup hugged the pillow tighter, her only response being a shrug and a nod.

Barry let out a sigh of relief. And then a laugh. He placed his palm on his face and shook his head. "Lup... I'm sorry, but this whole time I thought you were going to tell me you had an evil twin or something!"

Lup looked up at him with a tear-streaked face before she started laughing too.

They laughed for a moment before Barry reached out to cup her cheek. "But seriously babe... I still love you. This doesn't change anything between us."

Lup sighed and brushed a stray strand of hair from her face. "But it does... I'm not.... There's one last part of my transition I can't get right." Lup simply gestured to her lap without any further explanation.

"You... Oh. Oh. Okay. So... Okay. That's... Yeah. I mean… Yeah, I'm okay with that." Barry looked a bit flustered, but not disgusted. "I guess that changes.... Bedroom things. But I'm okay with that. We can figure this out."

Lup blinked, trying to wrap her head around his response. "Really? You're... You're okay with this?"

"Well, yeah. I love you, Lup. A lot. Like, a lot. You're beautiful and funny and you take my breath away every time I look at you." Now Barry was getting misty eyed.

Lup started crying again, but this time they were good tears. She threw her arms around Barry and knocked them both onto the mattress. She sobbed into his shirt for a while and he stroked her hair while he sniffled and cried as well.

Barry sat up once Lup had thoroughly soaked his shirt with snot and tears, taking it off and tossing it aside. "Can I just say..." He wiped his eyes and cleared his throat. "You did a really good job making those boobs."

Lup hit him light and playfully. "Barold!"

"I'm just being honest!" He laughed. "And as your nerdy boyfriend, it's my job to help you in whatever way I can to be comfortable with yourself. So if there's anything I can do for you, you come straight to me and tell me what you need."

Lup rubbed her tears away and kissed him, unafraid. "I love you, Bear."

"I love you too, Lup."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading my fic!
> 
> The last chapter planned is NSFW so if you're not cool with these nerds doing bedroom stuff, feel free to stop reading here. I may update this fic occasionally for edits as I didn't have a beta reader and just edited everything myself, but nothing plot changing (though I may edit wording to be more concise).
> 
> If you enjoyed it, feel free to leave a comment or kudos!


	4. The Stolen Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lup gets some Vitamin D. Barry sees stars. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter in The Fear Of Loving You!
> 
> It takes place during the evening after Chapter 3 and is NSFW (but no actual sex happens). This is not a plot heavy chapter in any way, so if you don't read this chapter, you're not really missing out on anything.
> 
> So if Blupjeans nerds getting a bit spicy doesn't appeal to you, feel free to leave here.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Barry and Lup shared a bed now. Partly because Lup knew their relationship wouldn't be in peril, partly because it made them feel safer—especially with the rest of the crew gone.

They were cuddling after the long day they had. Talking about feelings, Lup's transition, and boundaries. Lup was pressed against Barry, Barry had her wrapped in his arms, and everything felt peaceful.

Of course, both of them were feeling particularly lustful, so there were no promises that the peace would last long.

Barry had learned how impatient Lup usually was when it came to relationships, so he had no problem with them pushing old boundaries now that she’d come out. He was rubbing Lup's back under her shirt, his hands cool against her warm skin. Occasionally, his fingers traced along her spine and made her shiver under his touch.

"Bear?" She mumbled softly, looking up at him from where her face was buried.

"Hm?"

"If I may be so forward," She said, sitting up and looking down at him. "I want you to touch me in other places."

Barry cracked a smile and sat up as well, ears turning pink. "Yeah? Like where?"

Lup took his hand and guided it, under her shirt, onto her breast. "Like here." She breathed.

Barry gently rubbed his thumb over her nipple, taking in the way she sighed when he did. He squeezed her and reveled in her moan. Her skin there was as soft as he'd imagined it would be, if not softer.

"Barry, just like that..." Lup encouraged him. She caught his gaze. "Don't you dare stop."

He didn't. His other hand moved to give her other breast attention, and soon he had Lup squirming and whining on their bed. He paused only to remove her shirt, revealing her naked chest. He didn't mean to stop there, but he was taken aback by how gorgeous they were.

"Barryyyyy, I thought I told you not to stop." Lup whined.

"I'm sorry," Barry murmured, still awestruck. "You just... You're so beautiful, Lup... Your boobs..."

Lup smiled knowingly. "I told you I worked really hard on them. Do you like them, Barold?"

Barry nodded silently, then averted his gaze to look her in the eyes. "Can I... Can I put my mouth on them?"

"Hell yeah you can." Lup smiled, biting her lip in anticipation.

Laying her down, Barry put his mouth to work kissing her breasts and suckling her nipple, one at a time. Lup moaned without holding back, and it was the most heavenly sound he'd ever heard. It had his heart soaring and his dick throbbing. 

"Barry..." She whined. She cried out when she felt hands slip under her and grope at her ass, and she squirmed underneath him. "Barry... Barry. Wait." Her tone changed and Barry immediately stopped, looking up at her, a strand of saliva connecting his lips to her nipple. "I'm... I need to do something before we keep going."

"O-kay." Barry nodded, wiping his lips.

Lup spoke quietly and then looked back at Barry. "Okay, I'm good now."

"What did you just—"

"Barry,” She interrupted. “Right now, boning down with you is literally the only thing on my mind, but I don't think I'm up for it just yet. I'm—I just needed to get rid of my..." She mumbled something under her breath that Barry didn't quite catch, but he understood. He didn't know about dysphoria personally, but he knew enough to piece together that Lup cast Alter Self so she could continue comfortably.

"So... Are we good now?"

"Yeah, we're hella good."

Barry kissed her gently and smiled. "Just let me know if I go too far for you, okay?" Lup nodded and Barry shifted to pull her onto his lap.

Lup let out a hum when she felt Barry's erection poking at her. "You're an eager beaver, aren't you?" She boldly reached to palm him through his pajama pants, leaving him moaning low and husky. "Mm, let's see what you're always hiding under your blue jeans, now that you're wearing something a bit easier to remove." She tugged his pants down agonizingly slow, making a show of it. "And it looks like today Barold has opted for..." She snorted and burst into laughter. "Barry! You're wearing JOXERS!?"

"Sh-shut up..." Barry mumbled, face red. Sure enough, he was wearing boxer briefs printed to look like blue jeans. Joxers, if you will.

"Barold J. Bluejeans, I didn't think I could fall in love with you any more than I already have. But this, my dear, takes the cake. Nothing is sexier than joxers!"

"Don't make fun of me, they're... Good for if I forget to zip my fly." He muttered, but couldn't hide his smile when Lup laughed even harder.

Lup held her sides, her breasts bouncing as she laughed, until she finally calmed down. "I love you so fucking much, you big nerd." She smiled, giving him a big wet kiss before leaving a trail of kisses down towards his bulge. When she made it to his erection, she gave it a teasing kiss before pulling down his joxers with her teeth.

Barry's cock bobbed free from his boxers, the tip glistening with pre-cum. Lup licked her lips and examined him. "Mm, that's that uncut shit! Barry, you've been holding out on me."

"It's... My dick alright." Barry mumbled, feeling a bit embarrassed. He was a grower, not a shower, though he was still around average size to begin with.

"Barry, hold onto your brains, because I'm about to blow your goddamn mind."

"Wh—Aaah!" Barry was moaning before he could question Lup. Her lips wrapped around his cock, sucking without a warning, her tongue swirling around his head. Her hand fondled his balls as her mouth slowly took in more of Barry's dick. Lup hardly gave Barry enough time to adjust to being in her mouth before she was deep-throating him and nuzzling her nose against the curls around the base of his dick.

A loud, throaty moan escaped Barry, though he hardly made any effort to stop it. His dick throbbed at the feeling of Lup's throat closed around him. She was wet and warm and oh, oh, she was moaning too, she was _moaning_ around him and the vibrations of it nearly drove him over the edge.

And yet, as soon as it'd started, it stopped. With a wet pop, Lup pulled back, lips red and wet with saliva and pre-cum. Barry groaned at the sight of it.

Lup crawled onto Barry's lap and kissed him. Their kiss was sloppy and heated, Lup was clawing at whatever parts of Barry she could hold onto as he started groping her breasts again. "Barryyyy, Barry, yes...! Mmmmngh!" She reached behind her to clumsily stroke Barry again.

Lup moaning his name like a mantra with each squeeze he gave were enough to make Barry see stars as he came, spilling against Lup's back and pants, dribbling onto Barry's thighs as he moaned her name.

"Lup, gods, Lup..."

"Barry..." Lup keened, as his grip tightened on her breasts. "Damn, babe... You're so hot..."

Barry hugged her to his chest, his climax leaving his head in a fog.

"I guess I really did blow your mind, huh? That was pretty fast."

"Y-yeah..." Barry smiled sheepishly, coming back to his senses. "Did you... Uh... Was it good?"

"Oh it was good. It was very good, Bear. Kind of wish I didn't magic my girl away for that one. But there's always next time." Lup smooched him.

"So... okay. I guess I owe you then. Next time I'll have to make you cum twice."

Lup laughed. "I'll hold you to that, Barold."

Barry loved Lup so much.

Lup loved Barry so much.

And they didn’t stop loving each other regardless of Lup’s journey through gender.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! This fic was shorter than I anticipated but hopefully it satiated all you thirsty Blupjeans fans out there!
> 
> I'll write more content for this pairing because they absolutely deserve more love.
> 
> If you get the vine reference I put in there, you get a cookie. It sticks out but it had to be done. Also yes, I had to give Barry joxers, you're welcome for that.
> 
> Feel free to leave suggestions for what I should write these two nerds doing next!


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